I bet any mum you ask will admit to feeling guilty a lot of the time, even about the smallest of things. Mum guilt is real and unless you speak to other mums you don’t really hear about much, i personally don’t have any friends who have children so for me its non existent!. I have come to realise over the years that its perfectly normal to feel guilty at times and you are not alone in thinking this way.
- Screen time: I use the tv or ipads often, usually for when i’m making dinner or if the kids have been on a mad one for a while and i need some quiet! I sometimes just use it so i can simply sit down for a while. I used to feel super guilty about screens but i don’t anymore, i know most of the day they are away from them, playing or arguing lol and so a few hours here and there wont cause any harm.
We use “> this ipad 🙂
- Cereal dinners: Many days i dread dinner time and simply cant be bothered to cook a meal for the kids to then not eat it ( common with toddlers ) so yes there are days where the kids have cereal for dinner or pizza etc and you know what? these are some of their favourite dinner days lol. I like it too as theres no cooking and minimal clean up.
- Skipping baths: Kind of self explanatory really but i used to be rigid on routine and making sure the kids wash every single day, some days time gets away and we simply don’t have time. Kids don’t exactly smell and one night here and there wont cause any harm or drastically change their routine.
- Shouting: This one tends to be the one i feel most guilt about, when you have had the worst most stressful day and the kids continue to drive you up the wall and then all of a sudden you shout. What follows is instant guilt, which is actually a good thing because at least you care. Obviously shouting at your kids or anyone for that matter is a no no BUT it does happen and i guarantee even the most perfect looking mum has shouted before.
- Forgetting important things: I am no stranger to forgetting dates and then feeling bad. Ive forgotten non school uniform days, football club cancellation days in which kai has been waiting for me at the school ( yeah not cool ) as well as random things here and there. As as mum you are meant to know everything, know where all their toys are and know every single date! We are only human so obviously forgetting things at times is going to happen.
- Quality time together: Time together or rather lack of time is a big one, i wonder daily if i make enough effort with the kids or even played with them enough. The days where i have genuinely been busy and don’t get much time with them means more guilt comes out. When you have numerous children its even harder as your time is split between them, i know Charlie ( middle child) gets far less attention out of the three and i do get sad about it at times. It simply means scheduling some quality time with your kids every single day, even if its 15 minutes of proper attention. Kids don’t care for fancy toys etc all they want is for you to talk to them and make them feel loved and wanted, time will do that.
Let me know if you have felt mum guilt before, what about? parentings hard but its something we all struggle with at times.