Theres a lot of misconceptions about stat at home mums. It seems most assume its an easy job in which they go on lunch dates, shopping trips and sit down and watch tv all day. Now there are some who do this but majority do not. I cant remember the last time i just sat down all day!
For me its the hardest job i have ever done. We don’t get paid, we are every job role every day of the week! Its also one of the most lonely jobs if you are like me and suffer with social anxiety or just have a small group of friends of which you hardly see.You are on call 24/7 and in charge of that small persons life every single day, you need to make sure they are safe, fed, loved etc.There have been many days where i have had to go off into my bedroom for 5 minutes and just cry because the days been awfully lonely and hard. Some days the kids come out of school and things go smoothly but other days every single thing can go wrong.Most of the time you break up fights, have things thrown at you, piles of washing to sort, endless list of cleaning that needs to be done, meals to cook, play time scheduled, reading and homework needs supervising and you also spend 30 minutes trying to get all the kids washed without meltdowns.
Just to clarify i am not saying working isn’t hard or that dads don’t struggle to but just wanted to share what its truly like being a SAHM.Im also by no means complaining i’m just being honest about the not so fun times stay at home mums can face.
I am going to share an example of a typical day for me below. A rough outline of everything that goes on during the week.
6:30 am: Alarm goes off or kids have already woken us up and are jumping about in their bedroom.
7:30am-8:30am: I go to the gym (not daily) kyron sorts the kids for school.
9:00-9:30am: I return home and if i have any washing to put on i do this now.
9:30-10:00am: I take max out for the morning.
11:30-12:00pm: Get home and give max lunch, tackle my cleaning list.
12:30pm: Max has a nap, i then finish any housework and get my laptop out to work on my blog or research, check emails etc.
2:00pm-3:00pm: Play with max and prepare Charlies food for after school and also pack bag full of snacks.
3:00-4:430pm- Pick kids up from school and head to the park so they can run about.If you are mum of boys i’m sure you can relate! boys need to let of steam after school.
4:30-5:30pm: Pick up all the kids stuff they have dumped all over the floor since getting home. Prepare dinner, break up any fights, get one of the two older boys to run their bath. We eat dinner between 5 and 5:30pm, both the older two have their baths before dinner.
5:30-6:00pm: Kai and Charlie do their school reading and get bags ready for the next school day. Once this is done they can put the tv on.
6:00pm-7:00pm: I clean the kitchen and carry on with any washing. Then get to relax for half an hour and play with max before bathing him and putting him to bed at 7pm.
7:00-8:00pm: Tv goes off and me, kai and Charlie do something together. Colouring, drawing, board game, hamma beads.
7:30pm: Charlie goes to bed ( sometimes refuses though)
8:00pm: Kai goes to bed ( kai always refuses lol )
By this point i am shattered and mentally drained from all the child talking throughout the day. I don’t get much adult conversation so i’m frazzled come evening. Kids always seem to ask you life questions at this time of day too haha.
So theres my honest opinion and experience of being a SAHM. My day is mostly the same but some days i don’t go to the gym and other days we have appointments to go to or baby group. Kyron doesn’t work your standard working hours so he doesn’t get home until around half ten at night. So no extra helping hand at dinner times for me. I do want to point out that yes there are days i truly struggle but i am also very grateful that i currently get to see my kids as much as possible! i get to help them, watch them grow, know who all of their friends are, see them improve at school, get bedtime cuddles etc. Its not all bad but it is TOUGH. For me i do also want to work and learn all about child development and child psychology, so at the moment i use any time thats child free (when kids are in bed or at school) to research and study this so i can help and understand my own kids but also help others in the future. Having kids means yes you have less free time but what do you spend your free time doing? most sit on their phones or watch tv. I personally think thats a waste and use my time to improve and grow. If you are wondering how some mums seem to have more time to do things you wish you could do its just a matter of priorities:). We all have the same 24 hours in a day.
Any other mamas who can relate?